Let’s face it, nothing negative can come from positive self talk. Being kind to ourselves or extending a supportive friendship can only bring good things into our life. All too often I hear people say things like “I should have”, “it was probably my fault”, “I’m just not good at that”, “I need to try harder”. Would you tell a friend that they didn’t try hard enough when their new project didn’t work out? Or would you say “you’re right, you weren’t good enough”, when their marriage breaks down? “I’m not enough” is a negative mantra that can often loop in our our brain and keep playing.
Be your Own BFF
Being your own best friend means that you are just right exactly the way you are, flaws and all. Friends have that way of embracing our quirkiness and seeing through our false bravado in times of need. They give us positive messages about ourselves and make us feel good, happy and appreciated. Enjoy who you are and give yourself some quality time. If you can’t think of things off the top of your head that are great about you then try a little exercise. Ask yourself what you value in a friend? What are some qualities that your favourite people have? Write down the ones that could apply to you. Tell you that you’re funny, authentic and kind, and spend a bit of time hanging out with you. Learn to enjoy your own company and just be with yourself.
Clear space for the positive
Banish those negative thoughts as they no longer serve you. Even amongst the most dire of circumstances there can be found a positive moment. Choose to reach for the alternative to the negative because there is always another option. This idea may take a bit of practice but when that negative thought creeps in, stop, then think about what possible positive thought could be applied to the moment. You can choose to see a huge snowfall as terrible and catastrophic or you can slow down to enjoy the beauty of it, grab a tea and take a bit of extra time to get to work. Practice this step regularly and you will find there is less room in your life for the negative thoughts.
Talk to Yourself
Now this might seem a bit strange but I do it all the time. On more than one occasion I have found myself chattering away saying “you can do this” when faced with difficulty during my day. Tell yourself out loud that “you’ve got this” or “you’re a rockstar”. The more we hear these words the more our brains take them in and they become our truth. Whatever your mantra, practice this. You can talk to yourself in the shower or in the car on the way to work or wherever works for you. Say it loud and be proud about it because you are pretty awesome!